Upside-Down Leadership
You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 26 It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, 28 even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. (Mt 20:25-28)
Jesus has just finished telling the disciples for the third time about the death that he would die (v. 18). He is describing the pivotal point around which all of history pivots, the Cross. The son of God, the King of the Universe, who had already stepped out of heaven - Creator become Creature - was describing how soon he would be unjustly murdered and then conquer death rising from the dead so that God could unjustly grant us grace. In the awkward and confused silence that followed, James, John, & their mother thought that it would be appropriate to request from Jesus a place of honor and a place of power in the kingdom.
Jesus has been humbly demonstrating what it is to be King. Jesus, the greatest in the kingdom, consistently demonstrates what it looks like to be greatest in the Kingdom: Service and humility. They don't get it.
So Jesus makes it explicit, "You have been educated by the world. You see, in the world's system, you want to be a ruler or a leader because it is a position of great honor and power. When you are a leader, you get other people to do stuff for you. The higher you move up, the more people you can rule and therefore the better you. The greatest in the world's eyes are the ones that have authority over the greatest number of people. But that's not the way it is among us, in the Kingdom of God. It is a good thing to want to be great in God's Kingdom, but it will look upside-down to you and the world. The greatest is not the one who has the most servants but the one who is servant to the most. 'The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted (Mat 23:11).' The leader that My Father is looking for is the leader who looks like Me. Remember what I just told you: I came into the world as King of the world and I came to serve. I'm the one who, according to the way this world sees things, should be served by all, yet I have given my entire life up to serve you. In fact, this trip that we are taking to Jerusalem where I will be crucified, is just the ultimate expression of my greatness in the Kingdom, I am serving by giving up my entire life to ransom many from their sins so that they can be with Me forever in My Father's Kingdom."
So if we are to begin to study what it will look like to be a leader in the Church, we should guard ourselves very much from trying to model our leadership after the world's leadership. Church leadership is not expressed in board rooms. The character that God is looking for in a leader is not great intelligence or a charismatic personality; the great leader is not the one with the greatest self-esteem, internal drive, or who has self-actualized; the leader is not the one with vision; he is not the one with the greatest influence; the leader does not sit on a throne. The leader in the Kingdom is a servant. The leader in God's kingdom is "dignified, not double-tongued, not addicted to wine, not greedy for dishnest gain. He hold the myster of the faith with a clear conscience (1 Tim 3:8-10)." The leader who God wants is a man of "good repute, full of the Spirit and of wisdom (Acts 6:3)." The leader in God's church will look like Christ (Matthew 20:28) Most of all, the leader in God's kingdom is a humble servant.
Therefore, one of the two official "offices" / "titles" for leaders in God's church, "which he obtained with his own blood (Acts 20:28)" is Deacon which literally means, "servant". That's the same word as is in Matthew 20:26: "It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant," your diakonos, your deacon. So we seek to learn to lead the church the same way Christ led the church, motivated and enabled by His leadership for the church: "[He gave himself up for her, that he might sancitfy her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, withou spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish (Eph 5:25-27)."